What if the reason you're stuck isn’t because you’re lazy or lost, but because you’re doing work that was never really yours to begin with?

I’ve been asking myself this question more and more lately. And it’s slowly leading me and others down paths that feel less travelled, but far more fulfilling. And maybe, just maybe, more successful too…

If you're anything like me, you don’t just want any job. You want to do work that matters. Work that energises you. Work that gives you the motivation to keep going, especially, and I mean especially! When things get hard.

But how do you figure out what that work actually is?

The Difference Between a Job, a Career, and a Calling

We throw around these terms, job, career, calling, like they’re interchangeable. But they’re not.

• A job pays the bills. It’s functional. Necessary and sometimes that's enough.

• A career builds over time. It’s your resume, your network, your climb (basically what shows on your LinkedIn)

• A calling is different. It’s the work that calls you. Even when it's hard. Or rather, especially when it's hard.

The work that’s yours to do often lives at the intersection of all three. You need to survive, grow, and contribute. But too many of us get stuck in just one lane, and while that might be fine for a while, we can end up missing something deeper.

And I get it. It's not that simple once you factor in kids, a mortgage etc., but even so, I still believe it's worthwhile thinking about.

The 3-Lens Test: Energy. Impact. Integrity.

Here’s the simplest tool I use with people who feel like something’s off in their work.

The 3-Lens Test:

1. Energy – What gives you energy vs drains it?

2. Impact – Where do others say you make a difference?

3. Integrity – What feels aligned with your values?

When you find work that passes all three lenses, you’re working from a place within you that’s grounded and connected. Naturally, if you're doing your 'ideal work', chances are you'll get better at it.

At some point a few years ago you must've come across Ikigai. It's a Japanese term used to describe the intersection of what you love, what you're good at, what the world needs, and what you can be paid for.

Similarly, the ancient Indian concept of swadharma, your personal duty, is the unique contribution you can make based on your nature, gifts, and stage of life.

When you follow any of the aforementioned principles, work no longer feels like labour.

It’s Like Tuning a Radio

This isn’t about discovering your one true purpose with a lightning bolt of clarity.

It’s about narrowing in and tuning into the right frequency of thought and behaviour.

The signal is already there. You’ve felt it, in small moments when you were in flow, or when someone told you, “You’re really good at this,” and it hit differently.

But life is noisy. Jobs are noisy. Expectations are noisy.

Tuning into your work takes quiet reflection and a willingness to turn the dial again and again until the signal sharpens.

I nearly walked away…

A few years ago, I almost walked away from the work I do now.

Realign was just a loose idea. I was burnt out, unconfident and financially stretched. I felt incompetent, watching others land big roles while I stayed in the uncertain world of workshops and keynote talks.

I remember speaking at a school on the topic of resilience and how it's a prerequisite for a brilliant life. After the program, a student came up to me and said...

“You’re changing a lot of lives, huh? You must really love what you do.”

That was it. That was the signal.

Sometimes we can’t see the truth because it’s hidden behind low self-esteem or clouded judgment. In moments like that, sometimes the universe is compassionate. It has a way of reflecting back to us, our true selves, but only if we’re open. Slightly off-guard. Walls down.

I’m lucky that student caught me in that moment.

It cut through the noise and quietened the doubts about whether this path was really mine.

Finding the Signal in Your Own Life

You don’t need an epiphany. What you do need is a hell of a lot of curiosity and the perseverance to keep going.

As Rumi once said,

"When you start to walk on the way; the way appears."

Here are a few questions to spark your inner curiosity and help you find the signal…

• What part of your work do you do even when no one’s asking?

• What positive feedback do people keep giving you that you brush off?

• What drains you? What lights you up?

That should give you enough information to start walking.

As you keep going, you'll find the work that's yours to do will seem as if it was there all along.

And the chances are, it was, you just never paid close enough attention!